Back in the late ’90s during the hoopla about the movie “Titanic,” my initial decision to avoid the movie was overcome by the hysteria that swept certain parts of the population. Michelle and I decided we needed to see the movie to try to understand the society we were communicating to in ministry. (Michelle was leading a discipship group of high school girls at church and I was in the middle of my M.Div. program.)
We had a very different reaction to it than most people did, we had some good, long conversations about the themes and ideas underlying the movie, and we had some good discussions about what the response to it said about the state of our culture.
One of Michelle’s most insightful and practical insights was about the relationship between Jack and Rose, an important topic since she was leading a group of young women. Obviously they had sex in the car as the ship was headed for the iceberg, and the group all agreed that was a problem. The scene when the drawing was made (perfectly timed for a bathroom break, since a friend had warned me about it) generated a lot of discussion. But Michelle made the point that their physical relationship started in the iconic scene at the bow. After she explained why, I realized women have a very different set of perceptions about these sorts of things.
This column brought back some of that realization. With two teenage daughters, I’m very glad for a wise wife who has helped them navigate some of these issues. It’s worked out too that they save up their “chick flick” marathons for weekends I’m traveling. When they turn 25 and start dating (You wish. – ed.), I’m confident they’ll have a better perception than most of what to look for, and what to look out for, when it comes to relationships.